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QUESTIONS:
I have a 14 year old boy that talks nonsense incessantly. He is a good-natured kid, and I don’t think he speaks out of malice. He picks on his sister and me almost constantly. For example, I will say something..it could be anything.and he will reply, “Liar!” And then tell me I just got “epic owned.” He told me that he means no harm, and I do believe him. He and his friends banter that way. Only, I am not his friend; I am his mother. It gets wearisome, and borders at times on disrespect. I am a home educator. I am wondering if our being together most of the time has created a case of familiarity breeding contempt. Or is this natural to living with a teenaged boy? Should I just let it go as something that will pass with maturity?
ADVICE/SUGGESTIONS:
Let me answer your last question first: NO.....Using slang phrases directed toward a parent such as "epic owned", "liar", "dude" "freak", etc., is a way to disrespect and tear down the authority of a parent. As a teacher and coach of teens , as well as a parent, for most of my life, I was able to connect well with that age group, and truly enjoyed that quirky stage of life. But I never accepted a student going too slang on me and calling me "dude" and the like. You need to tell your son that he and his "posse" can be as "slang woke" as they wanna be--with each other, but not you.
There is some truth in the idea that "familiarity breeds contempt" but that really has no bearing as to whether you should accept his behavior as only a stage of immaturity. It is disrespectful. Feel free to "cancel that culture."
Contact me if you need follow-up.
Mike Smart, CLPC
"Parenting OutSmarted"
937-925-6136
smartmike59@gmail.com
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